In the future....
-
Tourism will be an organized religion-- It will supplant
Protestantism as the dominant sect in America.
-
Russia, Ukraine, and the Baltics will get together to form the
Soviet Reunion-- They'll release a commemorative album, "Siberia
Freezes Over."
-
Dogs will talk-- Their constant cries of "Throw the ball!
Throw the ball!" make them a lot less appealing as pets.
-
Oil will be discovered on the moon-- The event mysteriously
coincides with the sale of NASA to Texaco.
-
The Law of the Jungle will be rewritten-- "Survival of the
Fittest" will be changed to "Survival of the Most Knowledgeable of
Show Tunes".
-
Money will have an expiration date-- Amazingly, the economy
will improve.
-
Campbell's introduces Algebra Soup-- Its popularity spawns a
plethora of imitators, including Calculus Consomme and Chaos
Chowder.
-
Someone will put a Lo-jack on Waldo-- It brings a welcome end
to the irritating search for his whereabouts.
-
Dust mites will grow to the size of cows-- If you don't
believe me, check out my living room.
And, as always...
- The present will be the past-- And, of
course, the future will be the present. There will be no
future.
Visit the 5/23/95 Future
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